If only it were true

Every once in a while you get a little something in the inbox that just makes you want to chortle with mirth or die laughing. In this case it was mirth and it's probably 'cos one didn't read the message the way it was intended. The bold is them; the italics are the responses by the voice in one's mind.

Let's look at this little gem to see where it went wrong...

Hello my dearest Master,

Um wait, when did that happen? Checks account name... nope not His

How are you doing?

Well more relieved than a half minute ago

I am X, new on this site.

Clicks profile... so new that you haven't even had time to fill out a profile

I have gone through your profile,

Um, obviously not

am interested in serving you as your slave for the rest of my life

Oh wait, this could work...

You can email me on XYZ to have more pictures of me and more discussion because am not always here.

Knew that was too easy... bloody pics and chat, no one ever wants to do housework anymore

I wait for your reply soon

Well the disappointment is going to be mutual then

Your new slave, X

Sadly not, but how many fools will send emails in the hopes of acquiring that prize one does have to wonder